Well, another long and winding fantasy offseason is finally at an end. As I type this sentence, we are just a couple of hours removed from the kickoff of Chiefs vs. Lions, so I thought it would be fun to look back at the “greatest hits” of the 2023 fantasy offseason. After all, who doesn’t love a good countdown?
1. Jonathan Gannon Being a Goober
As the newest sideshow in the desert carnival known as the Arizona Cardinals, Jonathan Gannon has been a non-stop highlight reel this offseason. Admittedly, this pick isn’t very fantasy-oriented, but I just couldn’t help myself. From the “pew-pew” laser sounds to the “fire in your gut” speech, Gannon seems like an early favorite for worst hire. Naturally, I assume he’ll prove all of us Twitter vultures wrong and go undefeated with Josh Dobbs under center.
2. Greg Dulcich vs. Chig Okonkwo
This clash of second-year tight ends was a hard-fought, though brief, battle. Analysts on both sides of the debate came equipped with just the right advanced metrics to support their stance. Unfortunately, both sides lost this one. The Titans went on to sign DeAndre Hopkins and Greg Dulcich got out-snapped by the famously bad Adam Trautman in a preseason game.
In all seriousness, I think there’s serious post-hype sleeper potential for both of these guys. I am especially into Dulcich, whom I have frequently touted on The Factory Tour.
3. Tank Bigsby vs. Travis Etienne
This year’s edition of “you-can’t-like-two-backs-on-the-same-team” was a doozy. For what felt like a full month, you couldn’t refresh the website formerly known as Twitter.com without seeing another take on the Jaguars’ backfield. I’ll briefly break down each side of the debate for those of you who have actually seen the sun in recent months.
Team Tank: “Doug Pederson would never allow Travis Etienne to play on a third down or handle a goal-line carry. He will obviously defer to the third-round rookie in these vital, high-leverage situations.”
Team Etienne: “Travis Etienne is an elite talent and an American hero. He will play 105% of the snaps while Tank Bigsby holds the clipboard on the sideline.”
As the only sane person in this industry, I think both players are great bets at cost. I drafted Etienne often in best ball drafts this offseason. His combination of floor and ceiling made for a tantalizing bet in the fourth round. Meanwhile, Tank Bigsby was my most-drafted player in dynasty rookie drafts.
4. Trey Lance Discourse
There’s something about the Trey Lance saga that really brings out my existential side. This is a guy we spent the better part of two years arguing about, sending his ADP up and down the board like a game of Chutes and Ladders. We sent thousands of tweets arguing about the ability of a player with four(!) NFL starts, one of which came in a literal monsoon. And what did it all come to in the end? Nothing.
T.S. Eliot put it best when he said, “This is the way [Trey Lance] ends, not with a bang, but a whimper.”
5. Jonathan Taylor Not Getting Traded
The suspense. The drama. The unimaginable level of pettiness. This debacle was PEAK fantasy football offseason. Obviously, this outcome was not ideal for anyone (other than a handful of Zack Moss cultists), but man what a ride. Taylor to Miami seemed like a done deal before the rug was pulled out from under us.
In the wake of this news and Taylor’s placement on the PUP list, a massive buy window has opened in Dynasty. I don’t know if Jonathan Taylor will play games in 2023, but I do know that you should be sending offers out for him in every league.
Hey, look at that! You made it to the end of the list and, therefore, the end of the fantasy offseason. They say it’s about the journey and not the destination, but I couldn’t disagree more as I look ahead to this mouth-watering slate of Week 1 games. Bring on the football.
Thanks for reading this article! Follow me on Twitter at @paul_dff if you’d like to hear more from me. I love discussing strategy and trades and engaging in heated debates about this very silly game we play.
